So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
I need to move out. I just walk of shamed my way into a family breakfast party. There's no response when grandma says "where you coming from in heels at 9AM?"
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
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