shit! I think I may have lost something in your car. Look for anything that can possibly belong to me, especially look out for a pair of pink panties in a ziplock. I lost my spare and you better find it before someone else does.
Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
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