I threw up so much beer last night that my puke had a nice head on it.
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
There's some muscle relaxers in my bedside table. Sorry if my dildo is in the bathroom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
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