you turned your livingroom into a bong?
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
Randomize
