I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
What is a reasonable amount of condoms to keep in my condom wallet without it being creepy that I have too many?
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
Randomize
