Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
Come over. I'll eat you out and we'll make bacon.
best text I've received ever.
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
did i just see you in the movie theater carrying a margarita into Frozen?
All the 6 year olds are jealous of my alcohol
Looks like I accidentally stole two of your beers and left my pants at your place.
How did you leave without pants?
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
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