is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
you wrote "5 million dollars" in the tip line for the pizza delivery man and insisted that he deserves it
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
wow bdsm is so cute
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
I don't feel like that was meant as a compliment, but really still feels like one
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