I just saw a hot homeless man
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
Fuck you for setting me up with the guy from the Nickelback cover band
Payback for not stopping me from fucking the guy in the wookie costume
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
Randomize