the cashier at riteaid just made the sign of the cross before he rang up my pregnancy test. now i know god is on my side
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
we got kicked out of McDonald's because you kept screaming THAT SHIT CRAY at the woman in front of us because she ordered a fish filet.
...that shit cray.
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
Randomize