True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
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