Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
Woke to a half burnt 20 in my pocket, covered in mud, clothes all wet, so im assuming I didn't use that 20 you gave me for a taxi
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
you're a fucking everclear ninja. the whole goddamn formal blacked out. you're the worst dj ever
but I'm the best friend ever. I got you laid
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize
