So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
Randomize
