Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
Fyi when u order four mini bottles of scotch on a 45 min flight. The flight attendants jaw drops to the floor.
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
I just learned how to imitate a trains smokestack. The downside is it makes you look like you ate cocaine. The upside is YOU LOOK LIKE A TRAIN
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
My tinder date had to be home by 8:30 cause she's on house arrest.
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
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