she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
Never eat 3 McGriddles and drink a carton of milk. It's like you're successfully killing self but you're alive.
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
on todays agenda: meeting with a life coach then going to the dollar store to buy batteries for my vibrator. clearly im still unemployed.
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
I told my manager I was trying to conserve my energy for date night/Sexual Olympics later. That's legit for another break, right?
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
Randomize