Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
I got tossed from adult league soccer for telling a 55 year old I'd break his hip. I'm a productive member of society
THE MAINTENANCE MEN WERE DOWN STAIRS AND I THOUGHT THEY WERE MY MOM. I'VE BEEN YELLING 'GRILL ME A CHEESE' AT THEM FOR HALF AN HOUR
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
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