:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
I don't think the best pickup line was. Hey I have never made a girl orgasm before but I'm sure it will work on someone like you.
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
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