Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
im about to go through the checkout with 3 flasks and a wedding card. let the judgement begin!
update: cashier guessed cash bar before i could say anything. completely bypassed "dry" and knew cash bar right away. i love this state.
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
Randomize
