He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
I was speaking french the whole night. Until i got arrested. Then I decided I should probably start speaking English.
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
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