it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm wayyy too drunk to be in a parade right now
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
I just did a bump with my mom so I’d sober up for Black Friday shopping
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
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