So explain to me again how you wake up next to a Brazilian model and I wake up next to a turkey sub? And a jar of grey poupon.
I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
I cut my penus on the lid.
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
Randomize
