yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
My grandpa just complimented my boobs. Im taking this as a compliment but also brushing it off as alcoholism on his part.
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
Beautiful wedding. Beautiful bride. I got shitfaced. Came home and ate two corndogs. I'm still single.
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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