they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
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