this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
You do realize it’s only a matter of time before I have a bad day and come home with an alpaca?
Randomize
