I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
You know how I said I'd never worry about my roommate? Well I just walked in on her masturbating to Star Trek.
Did she boldly cum where no one has cum before?
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
Randomize
