yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
When I picked you up, you were drinking Maker's Mark out of the bottle with a crazy straw.
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Woke up the day after the party with a bruise on my stomach. Pretty sure my liver was trying to escape for fear of it's life.
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
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THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
I don't feel like that was meant as a compliment, but really still feels like one
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
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