So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
OMG I DIDNT READ THAT TEXT CAREFULLY CAUSE I'M ON THE DEVILS LETTUCE & I THREATENED TO PUNCH A CHILD OMG I'M SO SORRY
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
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