Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
I'm returning our mountain of beer cans, while wearing a Budweiser sweatshirt. i don't look like an alcoholic.
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
So I cleaned out my gym bag. Found half a bottle of malibu.
You know, I could pretend I'm shocked but what's the use?
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
I'm very fluent in vodka, but that seems to be a whiskey dialect.
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
If there's so much of a hint of a whisper from somebody I didn't tell personally, I will cut off your balls with a chainsaw, cauterize the wound with a flaming rusty spoon, feed your balls to your dog, and feed them to you when he shits them out, capiche?
You'll have to pretend I'm texting you with buddychecks.
Like the Jimeny Cricket of cockblocks.
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
Randomize
