weddingsv make me drug and hornr
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
Woke up next to a tiki torch spooning a plastic flamingo on a welcome mat i've never seen before with a "happy valentines day" balloon tied to my wrist, oh yeah and "i am a cougar" is written on my chest in sharpee and all the kitchen furniture is upside down...
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
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