Sponge bath it is.
I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
just went onto Yahoo and the featured article had a picture of one of the Jonas brothers. last two times the featured article was a celebrity's face the headline was "Michael Jackson is Dead" and "Pitchman Billy Mays is Dead" so naturally I got a little excited. Turns out he's just engaged. Who gives a fuck.
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
She's been with the dude for a week saying she's in love. Yeah so am I. I just opened this beer 5 minutes ago and I LOVE IT ALREADY.
This is a friendly reminder to try not to shit on the toilet seat. If our 4 year old can manage it, I think you can too.
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
Randomize
