I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
You do realize I got a panda tattooed on my ass just to get you laid, right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just saw a bunch of drunk old guys riding on the side of a modified old fire truck yelling at cars and smoking while they looked for parking...promise we will be just like them when we grow up?
I'm craigslisting fire trucks as we speak
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
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