Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
I wish i had a shirt that said, "I know what you're thinking and it's not herpes on my face"
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
Some people dream of being astronauts others dream of having genitalia that shines like Edward Cullen in the sun
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
I’m literally lecturing this class on professionalism, while my body is undoubtably covered in leftover cum from last night. I’m a fucking role model.
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
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