Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
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