Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
I just tried to drunkenly fart the beat of Disturbia by Rihanna
I had a dream last night that Anthony Bourdain gave me a vibrator.
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
In my next life I better get to be a bird. Fuck flying. I'm gonna shit on your car. Every. Day.
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
As I was blowing him, he proceeded to tell me that his friend who I blew years ago gave me a five star review on my BJ skills. And, he agrees.
Atta girl.
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
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