Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
Randomize
