kristin has been a bad kristin
Our house smells like week old pizza, beer cans, cigarettes, and depressing career tracks....get lysol.
so apparently we got drunk enough at the reception to rip the center pieces apart and use the flower vases as "fancy glasses"
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
Between my vibrator and my iPhone carpal tunnel is inevitable.
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
Randomize
