How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
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