Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
ok so I'm texting you now like I promised instead of drunktexting aaron and telling him how badly I want his cock tonight. aren't you proud?
this is Aaron, hi
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
I come back upstairs and there he was sitting in a speedo. He handed me a blanket and said "let's cuddle" how is this real life?
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
Randomize
