Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
I Pavlov-trained him by smacking him in the nuts anytime I caught him looking at another girl in public. To this day, he's afraid to break eye contact with me in a restaurant if a tall busty blonde walks in.
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
Randomize
