Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
Her directions to the house party: "the north star will guide you, turn left. I'm wearing the potato hat"
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
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