Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
um i just realized that some of the people at my family reunion look inbred. thats not a good sign.
hahaha beady eyes set close together? defs inbred.
my dads cousin just put a cig in his dogs mouth and says, "look its a commercial for newport!" holy hell i hope im adopted.
i just fingered the ice cream at home instead of getting a spoon
been there done that
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
Randomize
