My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
yo dude i was totally schwabbin last night.
what does that even mean?
you ever see those charles schwabb commercials, where the people are like half cartoon half real.... well yeah i saw that in real life.
I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
I am trying to think of a way to tell him about thanksgiving and the following weekend in a way that makes me sound funny and exciting and not like an alcoholic
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
is it fun? or sober?
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
Talk shit all you want but with my new knife sharpener I have a lethal razor sharp pizza cutter. Fuck with me Mario I dare you!
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