what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
Randomize
