Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going?
who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
Just had a pleasant conversation with a mugger while he was taking off my shoes. Why can't I get along with people like this sober?
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
