Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
Randomize
