ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
I wish the iPhone would register texts from 11:59 as "Last Year" instead of "Yesterday."
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
That's totally the Emoji for "just ran into some girl who knows I know she had an abortion"
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
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