Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
my mind is a poorly written porno when i'm drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
Randomize