My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
I unwillingly was the ball between four hungry hippos last night. I thought the one chick was actually going to eat me
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
So, i took all the condoms from his nightstand, not in the crazy ex way, but in the I paid for them way.
you can't tell me you didn't shit your pants I saw them in the trash can by the bathroom.
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
Randomize
