He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
A freshman just referred to Home Improvement as 'tim the tool man show'. People born after 1990 are not people.
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
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