I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
You need a sexual gate keeper
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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