Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
It's official: I now only own one pair of jeans that I haven't blown the crotch out of. It might be time to put a stop to red wine Wednesdays.
You mean, in addition to red wine every-fucking-days?
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize
